::Wo hen guai!::

Deep in thoughts

I've been thinking about lotsa stuff lately (haven I been always). Like wat's my ambition, who r my frans, am I really anti-social, do I regret choosing rj... blah blah blah.

Firstly, wat's my ambition? No idea. I just take things at my own stride. Like I never thought I'll choose this mathsy combi but in the end I did. Never did I see myself wearing the stupid green skirt but I am now. I wanted to go hc, take up LEP (chinese), den maybe go be some journalist or writer or something (I used to be very proud of my zuo wens alright!) But now, I'm taking this er xin double maths, phy, econs combination. It's not really tt bad actually other then physics cause I dun mind maths and econs' quite interesting. Many asked if I'm going to be some engineer or something related but I dun think so? I really CANNOT relate to physics. It's not for me. Haiya... at most I end up being maths teacher la, send all ur children to me n I'll make them SUFFER! hahahahahahahah! Maybe I'll end up being a movie director, a pilot, a popular celebrity, a tai-tai *woosh!* or maybe a pianist... I'm dreaming again...

Let's leave the franz part last la... Hmm... Do I regret choosing RJ? actually yes n no. Yes cause I would have gone to hc and see pple I can relate to like JIAYIN! I miss her loads la! like today got GP common test den were supposed to sit according to index. Haiya, wanted to cry cause I miss seeing her backview and her turning around so that we can yak yak yak away. Then there's yiyou! I think if I dun see her anytime soon, we'll end up at strangers... I miss doing pw with her, travelling all the way down to clementi on 165 just for pw and each session ended up with everyone pissing each other off. Also can see my ex-classmates like Eddie, naga, jingyi... sian ah! I miss everyone. Then I think

I dun miss AJ tt much cause PE there is SIAO! But I do miss some of the pe teachers, they're extremely nice like Ms. Ong! she rox! I just miss the OG n my class plus pple whom I've met along the way during cca times. Even those whom I've only spoken to like once or twice. I miss mdm woon n ms bok! I especially miss the econs period where Mdm woon n xavier will argue over some concepts. funny! I think I need a xavier in my class but I think he'll DIE in it. LOL. I miss phyllis too! so long nv see her le! must call her up one day before she mugs like crazy during the holiday. I even miss akshay la for gdness sake, I think there's something wrong with me. But I guess I was happy during 1st 3 months, felt like home. Can't blame me if I'm pro AJ la. Though building looks as though it's going to collapse anytime, it still felt like home.

On the other hand, I didn't regret choosing RJ cause got Cathy with me! plus xiutang, huilian, val, grace, xx! Though xx is doing her disappearing act once again. RJ is a very erm... conducive environment la, gd facilities plus it's so near my house. I mean I hafta admit I didn't really make the effort to go hang out with the class resulting in my small pathetic group of friends so there's really no one I can blame. And I really like the library... I feel "safe" in it... hahah. Plus I kinda like some of the pple whom I met though there are OBVIOUSLY SOME whom I can't stand at all.

Who are my friends ma... I dun really wanna think about it. I mean, no point tryin to figure out wat everyone's thinking, I wun ever come to a concrete conclusion one la. So everyone's my friend and same philosophy everytime. If u're nice to me, I'm nice to u. If u're NOT, den I'm sorry I hafta treat u tt way. =P I dun think I'm tt anti-social lor. I'm sociable in ny n aJ, just not in rj. I can feel that tension and pressure around in school la, the type tt'll make u feel like hiding in the corner, away from everyone. It's quite gross actually. Everyone's too perfect there, it's WEIRD. I guess just eh... wait n see ba.

I have this feeling I keep blogging on the same stuff... Hmm. Fine, shall try not to blog about school. I think pms is coming... coming... coming...
-xin-
you sing!

9:11 pm

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