::Wo hen guai!::

Fake VS True

I'm happy, I'm sad, I'm confused actually. Long time since I updated... actually not exactly... i attempted to update some time ago but apparently the stupid comp has something against me and sort of like erased the whole entry. Was so piss tt I refused to update until now. haha. I'm not really tt busy actually, just damn tired each day. No worry, the blog's alive again due to popular demand!! *yea rite*

So... life's very routine nowadays, go sch, have lectures, have lunch, have tutorials, go for make up, go home. That's it. Pretty much the same though I felt tt the make up lectures were a waste of my time cause basically I DO NOT learn anything cause teachers are like bullet trains. PW has started, PIECE OF SHIT! was actually looking forward to doing PW cause thot will be like quite fun, can do something tt's like not exactly in textbks but WTH. This yr, the task topics are damn difficult la! wat natural forces and different perspectives. Those are alright actually, it's the task requirements tt make life difficult. Shan't list them, will bore ppl to death.

My beloved PW teacher is bloody hell strict, hypocritical, rigid and totally lack creativity and enthusiasm. Perfect example of a teacher in the 1960s. For goodness sake, it's already 2005! And she's supposed to be our teacher mentor?! YAR YAR YAR. Thanks alot for giving us senseless answers. Not nonsensical, just answers that makes u go "huh?" I noe we're suppose to think for our own but at least help us by quoting examples or watever and not go "u tell me wat u think and i'll ans yes or no" WHATEVER la.

Next is my fav topic, my class. My class...hmm... gd n bad. kinda complicated. typical rafflesian class? not exactly typical but maybe a stereotypical class. Maybe a little political as well? Basically I just stick to myself, tt's it. I dun even have a close clique. I admit, I'm pathetic. The only consolation is that it's only 2 yrs, I WILL SURVIVE!

Well, lotsa tutorials to do, lotsa stuff to catch up on but I'm just too tired to do anything. I'm tired, I lack enthusiasm, I lack the motivation... Kami-san, bestow me some motivation and drive so that I will pass my common test which will be on the term 3 wk 1.

Realised I've already put one foot into the society. It's horrible, disgusting, dark and the only person u can seem to trust is urself. How bad can it get? There's too much politics going as seen during the council elections where first thingy pple say is "hi, I'm XXX... I'm running for council, do vote for me" or the kind tt I totally detest, person who has ignored me for several yrs, "hi yuxin, do vote for me!" YAR RITE, dream on. Vote for u? In ur nxt nxt nxt nxt nxt nxt nxt life. And exco elections for various ccas are starting and u can feel the competition everywhere. Trust me, it's not the friendly kind. Disgusting u know? it's ultimately DISGUSTING! Most JCs, not just rJ are filled with desperados who wanna get into some stupid exco or council just for the sake of testimonial... Worse, SOME pple join service ccas such as interact to make it look nice on their resume. Not all but SOME!

Heard some stuff about people changing during their JC life so that they can become more popular and stuff like tt cause no one really knows about them. NO, I do not mean that if they're kinda loserish during their sec sch life (like urs truly) den they have to be labelled as a loser for the rest of their lives. HOWEVER, please do not change into those kinda bimbotic idiots tt attract ppl's attention cause I for one will definitely NOT give u any of mine. What's wrong with being yourself? maybe u can change a little to fit in with others better but please stop acting as though u noe the whole sg population and tt u're super nice of watsoever.

Sch has become a drama centre for me where I observed various different people or rather end up watching some "shows". Now whenever I meet new ppl, I will give a friendly "hi!" but opening up to them is out of questions cause fang2 ren2 zhi1 xin1 bu4 ke3 wu2 yar, especially now that everyone's older. I dun mind school actually, I'm just afraid of everyone now.

I heard most that succeed in life are as sly as a fox. If tt's the case, pls let me end up as a loser. I'm not totally innocent but I choose not to exploit others or rather, I prefer to carry things out with the POSITIVE notion of "I do this because I wanna do it and enjoy doing it" Idealistic, so wat? I'm NOT faKe!
-xin-
you sing!

10:04 pm

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