::Wo hen guai!::

I'm an InTrApErsOnaL!

You scored as Intrapersonal. You prefer your own inner world, you like to be alone, and you are aware of your own strengths, weaknesses, and feelings. You learn best by engaging in independent study projects rather than working on group projects. People like you include entrepreneurs, philosophers and psychologists.

Tt's really me ah? I knew it! I'm anti-social!
-xin-
you sing!

3:50 pm

---++---
Friday, April 22, 2005

In addition.....

WAH! I actually didn't realise I've not updated since 2 april... COOL!
anyway, just wanna add on...

Happy BirthdaY to Huilian! dunno whether will see or not la.

To everyone out there, stay cool and be YOURSELF ALRIGHT! I like u because u are who u are! yup!

P.S: I feel stupid writing this but who cares lor.
-xin-
you sing!

10:38 pm

Fake VS True

I'm happy, I'm sad, I'm confused actually. Long time since I updated... actually not exactly... i attempted to update some time ago but apparently the stupid comp has something against me and sort of like erased the whole entry. Was so piss tt I refused to update until now. haha. I'm not really tt busy actually, just damn tired each day. No worry, the blog's alive again due to popular demand!! *yea rite*

So... life's very routine nowadays, go sch, have lectures, have lunch, have tutorials, go for make up, go home. That's it. Pretty much the same though I felt tt the make up lectures were a waste of my time cause basically I DO NOT learn anything cause teachers are like bullet trains. PW has started, PIECE OF SHIT! was actually looking forward to doing PW cause thot will be like quite fun, can do something tt's like not exactly in textbks but WTH. This yr, the task topics are damn difficult la! wat natural forces and different perspectives. Those are alright actually, it's the task requirements tt make life difficult. Shan't list them, will bore ppl to death.

My beloved PW teacher is bloody hell strict, hypocritical, rigid and totally lack creativity and enthusiasm. Perfect example of a teacher in the 1960s. For goodness sake, it's already 2005! And she's supposed to be our teacher mentor?! YAR YAR YAR. Thanks alot for giving us senseless answers. Not nonsensical, just answers that makes u go "huh?" I noe we're suppose to think for our own but at least help us by quoting examples or watever and not go "u tell me wat u think and i'll ans yes or no" WHATEVER la.

Next is my fav topic, my class. My class...hmm... gd n bad. kinda complicated. typical rafflesian class? not exactly typical but maybe a stereotypical class. Maybe a little political as well? Basically I just stick to myself, tt's it. I dun even have a close clique. I admit, I'm pathetic. The only consolation is that it's only 2 yrs, I WILL SURVIVE!

Well, lotsa tutorials to do, lotsa stuff to catch up on but I'm just too tired to do anything. I'm tired, I lack enthusiasm, I lack the motivation... Kami-san, bestow me some motivation and drive so that I will pass my common test which will be on the term 3 wk 1.

Realised I've already put one foot into the society. It's horrible, disgusting, dark and the only person u can seem to trust is urself. How bad can it get? There's too much politics going as seen during the council elections where first thingy pple say is "hi, I'm XXX... I'm running for council, do vote for me" or the kind tt I totally detest, person who has ignored me for several yrs, "hi yuxin, do vote for me!" YAR RITE, dream on. Vote for u? In ur nxt nxt nxt nxt nxt nxt nxt life. And exco elections for various ccas are starting and u can feel the competition everywhere. Trust me, it's not the friendly kind. Disgusting u know? it's ultimately DISGUSTING! Most JCs, not just rJ are filled with desperados who wanna get into some stupid exco or council just for the sake of testimonial... Worse, SOME pple join service ccas such as interact to make it look nice on their resume. Not all but SOME!

Heard some stuff about people changing during their JC life so that they can become more popular and stuff like tt cause no one really knows about them. NO, I do not mean that if they're kinda loserish during their sec sch life (like urs truly) den they have to be labelled as a loser for the rest of their lives. HOWEVER, please do not change into those kinda bimbotic idiots tt attract ppl's attention cause I for one will definitely NOT give u any of mine. What's wrong with being yourself? maybe u can change a little to fit in with others better but please stop acting as though u noe the whole sg population and tt u're super nice of watsoever.

Sch has become a drama centre for me where I observed various different people or rather end up watching some "shows". Now whenever I meet new ppl, I will give a friendly "hi!" but opening up to them is out of questions cause fang2 ren2 zhi1 xin1 bu4 ke3 wu2 yar, especially now that everyone's older. I dun mind school actually, I'm just afraid of everyone now.

I heard most that succeed in life are as sly as a fox. If tt's the case, pls let me end up as a loser. I'm not totally innocent but I choose not to exploit others or rather, I prefer to carry things out with the POSITIVE notion of "I do this because I wanna do it and enjoy doing it" Idealistic, so wat? I'm NOT faKe!
-xin-
you sing!

10:04 pm

---++---
Saturday, April 02, 2005

I luv greeN

Green

You are a very calm and contemplative person. Others are drawn to your peaceful, nurturing nature.

Find out your color at Quiz Me!

-xin-
you sing!

1:30 pm

Long after, the story continues...

It's been like a super long time since I updated this blog ba. Was kinda busy and also partly lazy to update. I'm now officially a student of the prestigious Raffles Junior College~ so proud of myself *not* Life's okie there. Everything was what I expected, competitive, super English environment, filled with scholars (esp my current class) n Rafflesians frm RGS n RI.

My classmates seem alright, pretty nice though everyone's like nice to me base on courtesy? Maybe cause I still dunno them well n I dunno why, I just dun feel like socialising in RJ. Kinda bad I know but I've currently turned into a 100% introvert in RJ. Worse thing is that I can't actually speak normally there, like I have to think twice or thrice before opening my mouth, which is DIFFICULT! Hence, I'll just shut up n give that stupid patronising smile. I think almost all the guys in my class are from RI and everyone's like in cliques. Thank gdness Cathy's in my class or else I'll be super lost ba. Moreover the sch's damn big and I still dunno my way around. Trust me, after each class, I'll have a lost look on my face -.-

The PRCs in my class are very nice but they're super hardworking (duh!) Den also got this St Nick's gal also super nice. Though I still feel like I dun belong, I'll just let nature takes its course, I know I must make the effort but I dunno la... lost the enthusiasm le.

Okie, let me recap what have I done during the time that I didn't update, though I think I've almost fully forgotten everything.

Went out with 0805/AJ or rather Chris, Yiyu, Jinyong n Kaiyang (Xavier joined us later), watched Hitch at PS. Went arcade, watched them played cause I super she3 bu4 de2 spend the money on arcade... maybe cause I also not very comfortable in playing with them? After that walked to Orchard, walk walk walk, went takashimaya's watson umpteen times for a very "special" reason though not specifically for me... ate at yoshinoya. I realised the 2 times I went out with the class, twice I ate at yoshinoya. Dun really like la but watever lor, at least can eat something n sit down. Or else will rot to death. Well, Hitch was really nice n funny but wun elaborate cause I think half the world watched it le. That day was fun though didn't really do much. Maybe cause it's the people tt went out I went out with ba.

Spent my birthday in Orchard with buddies (the 3 usual ones la), ate NYDC! YeaH! First time le! pizza not very nice, spaghetti also sO sO but the mudpie's NICE!!! nice nice nice!! everyone must go try k!! I think it's oreo one... can't remember but it's delicious! Den went strolling in Orchard, went home kinda early cause was really BORED. Received a nice toy frm them, it's a 'bread'... thanx, I really like it! ALthough I still dunno where to put it, so it's still in the paper bag. It's kinda like a unexpected present ba cause I thot they'll give me what I like i.e comics, CDs but not like a toy cause I'm SEVENTEEN le! getting old... omg! But I still like soft toys n cute stuff, so who cares, I'm young @ heart out of sch but old in, even drained sometimes... sigh. Okie, out of point.

To those tt didn't wish me happy birthday, I'm disappointed with u guys =P those who did, thanx!! oh yar, suyee, sihui, phyllis n (surprise surprise)robert gave me a toy tt totally looks like MickeY Tan laaaaaa... haiyo, I'll definitely remember AJ this way man. LOL!

I miss my friends in AJ, so I went back yesterday. Saw their new classmates, got one super duper resemble KY, same pattern n got this really nice girl too, though I forgot from wat sch but I think there's like dun have 2nd intake lydat, just pple who transferred from other classes. Went back during their mass lunch break, but those pple ah, playing in class... like gambling den lydat leh... wah liew, admire them... tsk. I miss playing dai dee with them, sad. Though they like dun really miss me lydat but I definitely miss them. All down to earth, playful yet hardworking enough ppl. Sigh but dun think I'll be happy in AJ too cause the class is not THE class anymore. Plus dun really like "like" the newcomers but I think cause dunno them yet. Stupid KY la, owe me money dun wanna return but nvm... I miss the class, lalala... even Shaun n Robert, the irritating pigs. Raining currently, suit the mood.

But hor, wat's with the stupid rj tag on me ah, it's DAMN BLOODY HELL IRRITAING LOR! n sometimes I wonder if they're mean cause they're plain mean or cause they're just playing, meaning I think too much la... watever.

Was about to get ready to go out today when Chris called, saying none of the guys replied him n that it seems as though only 3 pple going out so cancel today's outing lor. Plus Cathay not showing Ms congeniality 2 n house of fury. Wanted to meet up with the 1st intake of 0805 today but no one enthu lydat so cancel lor. Yesterday was really excited about today la cause maybe can go out watch movie n also see the people. Since now it's cancelled, lydat lor. I'm really really super disappointed but no choice la, can't like FORCE them to go out with me rite cause they also have their own stuff n own restrictions. So now I'm rotting at home, maybe I should just study since it seems like it's all fated.

Wanted to see if xx or sz wanna go out but they aren't free so it's alright... I'm still super sad, depress, forlorn, downtrodden (watever, limited vocab) but nvm...

I dun understand lor, seventeen is a lousy age, the time where everything turns out to be depressing, how can I enjoy my JC life? I still bears hope but doubt seems to be taking over. Make sense? I think my english sux.
-xin-
you sing!

12:11 pm

---++---